From Hilary Barry to Max Key: Is this the next cast of TVNZ’s Celebrity Treasure Island? – NZ Herald

OPINION:

The rumour mill has gone into overdrive as it’s been confirmed that TVNZ’s hit show Celebrity Treasure Island will soon return to our screens.

But with the much-loved franchise, comes a much-speculated cast. And for years there have been hotly contested names thrown around in inner media circles and industry whispers; “Why won’t X say yes?” or “How many times has Y said no?” and “Z did what with W?”

With all eyes on the casting directors, what potential aces does TVNZ have up their sleeves to make Kiwis tune in in droves and scream “It’s giving iconic” at their screens?

If we can’t have our All-Stars format back (hint hint) on the idyllic shores of Fiji (Bula) with the likes of Hayley Holt and Matthew Ridge (legends only) battling it out, can we at least have the cast of our dreams?

From an Aussie intruder to a bandana-wielding wild card – here’s who we think are well overdue to hit the shores of Celebrity Treasure Island and who – if nothing else – would make for bloody good TV.

Jeremy Wells

It would be a treat for the eyes and ears with Radio Hauraki presenter Jeremy Wells taking to the island. The Seven Sharp host knows how to be a team player, but also when alliances need to be severed – and dammit he’s got the good hair to get away with it.

Role on the island: Evil genius

Anika Moa

Moa is known for her singing skills and ability to conjure up a laugh from literally anyone. But our girl is also physically tough and would be a key asset to her team. Pair this with her ability to keep things entertaining and you’ve got a producer’s dream.

Role on the island: The laughs

Nick (Honey-Badger) Cummins

While he’s sworn off reality TV the Honey-Badger and his iconic one-liners would get buy-in from a previously untapped audience for the show – Australia. His athletic prowess would see him with a target on his back, but his bushman skills and ability to make a hut out of nothing but a machete and enthusiasm also might see him take the W.

Role on the island: The skilled bushman

Suzy Cato

Ever wondered what an elimination battle would look like if Suzy Cato was involved? It’s giving see ya see ya later to competitors and giving viewers the casting, they truly want. Cato has an extensive skill set, is loved by literally everyone and serves nostalgia in boatloads. Her island bestie you ask? You already know it’s Honey-Badger.

Role on the island: The lover, not a fighter

Tana Umaga

He’s one of the most iconic All Blacks of all time and Kiwis would love nothing more than to see the retired winger score on their screens. The now coach would no doubt be a loveable sounding board on the island but these traits could find him blindsided by the drama.

Role on the island: The coach

Hilary Barry

Our shoulder-serving Seven Sharp presenter has the charm and wit that make the perfect Treasure Island contestant. Barry will be the seasons Susan Devoy, speaking her mind and breaking rules – check her shoes for oxo cubes immediately. Put her on the opposing team to fellow presenter Wells and the television gold is ripe for the picking.

Role on the island: The rule breaker

The TVNZ presenter has been swanning off to idyllic locations lately, and maybe Treasure Island is his next destination. Gibb made a name for himself as a children’s TV Presenter on hit show Squirt, but our gut tells us that a grown-up and highly entertaining Gibb might not get a G rating. Could Gibb be about to enter his villain era?

Role on the island: The contender

Laura McGoldrick

The Hits radio star and presenter Laura McGoldrick might be one of the most loved names in the entertainment industry, but we also know that Laz can bring chaos when needed. McGoldrick would be the islander pouring you a smuggled-in pinot gris after a loss and telling you you’ve totally got it next time.

Role on the island: Big sister

Uncle Ticks

He was launched to internet fame with his Instagram and TikTok’s documenting life living with Tourette’s, but it’s Uncle Ticks sharp wit that would see his star continue to rise in this game. If his viral videos are anything to go by, he’s not afraid to wind up those around and behind all the antics there’s a heart of gold.

Role on the island: The instigator

Green made a name for herself after winning now husband Art Green’s season of The Bachelor. But now a grown-up Maddy would come to CTI with knowledge of past seasons from Art and physical strength that can only come from hashtag paleo, hashtag wellness, hashtag she’s given birth to two children and can channel her hypnobirthing practises in any situation.

Role on the island: The warrior (and worrier)

Eli Matthewson

If there’s one person who deserves a reality TV do-over it’s comedian Eli Matthewson. After his swift (and honestly painful) departure from DWTS, TVNZ would score big with the ever-so-charismatic Matthewson on the island bringing the laughs and some juicy alliances.

Role on the island: The comedian (literally)

Grace Palmer

Actress Grace Palmer is already serving the best island looks and she may not have even been cast yet. She’s the funny girl who might go underestimated until you find yourself up against her in the final. Palmer has what it takes to win and windup in style.

Role on the island: The plot twist

He’s the yin to TI host Bree Tomasel’s Yang and when he’s not having a laugh on the pairs ZM radio show, you’ll find him on his podcast Parenting Hangover, serving realness about life as a parent with How To Dad (who would also make a fantastic casting). Match up the ex-Cleo Bachelor runner-up with Wells and you may have found this season’s Lance Savali and Art Green.

Role on the island: The banter

Julian Dennison

Actor Julian Dennison has been jet-setting across the globe from role to role that see his star continue to rise. His next role you ask? Clearly, the hessian bunkbeds of CTI are calling his name and the notorious jokester would thrive in the chaos.

Role on the island: Controversy King

Nigel Latta

Nigel Latta will get inside the minds of his fellow contestants and see their scheming coming a mile away. We would also pay to see the TV psychologist try and get inside the mind of the Honey-Badger and find himself “sweating like a bag of cats at a greyhound meet.”

Role on the island: The psychologist

While we know the talented Tui is in hot demand right now and for good reason. The rugby players got the sporting skills to take home challenges for her team but also the smile that would leave the other team honestly supportive of being left hungry for the 22nd consecutive day.

Role on the island: The legend

Toni Street

Coast presenter Toni Street would be an absolute audience win, with fans tuning in to see just how well the mum of three takes to island life. Street would no doubt be a fierce competitor while also making it look good in some Augustine island looks.

Role on the island: The voice of reason

Michael Galvin

I for one have never seen actor Michael Galvin in any role other than Chris Warner on Shortland Street and it’s honestly starting to feel personal. Why won’t you let us in Michael? We just want to get to know you. Let us do so when you are stretched to your limits, isolated in a remote location with a poorly tummy and bug bites. Thank you.

Role on the island: The mystery man

Where in the world is Keisha Castle-Hughes? The Whale Rider actress and Oscar nominee now seems to prefer life out of the spotlight, but this is OUR dream cast and dreams (unlike many of these pricy castings) are free and non-contractual.

Role on the island: The unphased queen

Max Key

I know you simply gasped reading this, as Key hitting Treasure Island would be serving equal parts drama and nepo baby. The ex-Prime Minister’s son is known for speaking his mind and we can’t help but think that sleep deprivation and cold rice might just bring out moments more iconic than his bandana era.

Role on the island: Mad Max

Ricardo Simich

Want to stir the pot? Spy’s very own Ricardo Simich is the only man for the job. He knows more secrets about the contestants than they probably know about themselves and will store them away for when he needs them most. Simich would be the ultimate intruder to drop in just when viewing (and the pantry cupboard) is getting stale, in order to truly bring the spice.

Role on the island: The Spy

Jenni Mortimer is the New Zealand Herald’s lifestyle and entertainment editor. Jenni started at the Herald in 2017 and previously worked as an education publication editor. She’s also the host of The Herald’s parenting podcast One Day You’ll Thank Me, mum to Knox and believes Michael Scott is the greatest motivator of our generation.